When I Was Young

Ok, so I'm not exactly getting up there in the years but the point is that I feel like it. Kinda. I miss when I used to go out on the weekends. I miss when I wasn't juggling all the cooking, housework, animals, homework and everything else like a clown playing with chainsaws. It sounds absolutely horrible to say but the only thing about my mom leaving that is really bothering me is that I'm always exhausted and weak from life. I hate it. I especially hate it because there's not a snowball's chance in hell that I'm going to show it. Anyone whose been here knows that the real backbreaker is the acting tough. Pretending to be strong is what finally kicks us in the knees and knocks us to the ground. And I am just so eagerly anticipating that. Having to play part-time mother and housewife on top of Senior Project and college prep is starting to make my head feel like a shaken up snowglobe after a three year old has discovered it and vigorously beat it to death in that way that three-year olds are prone to doing. Man, I never thought I'd agree with a commercial. Life really does come at you fast. And it goes by a hell of a lot faster. I feel like I've been chasing after a huge bus that has LIFE written on the side and about four hundred seventy three miles later, I just realized I really don't want to catch up. The only problem is that the line of people behind me chasing after it to with a big sign over their heads that reads SOCIETY won't let me stop and drag along behind. I have to keep running or get trampled to death. Stupid survival instinct. No matter how tempted I am to get trampled, I'm still running.